what's in a name

My last name is made up.

No, really.  I'm being serious.

The last name "McLaws" doesn't exist beyond my sixth-great-grandpa.  We're not really sure why.  We don't know when it was changed, or why.  And we can't find any records beyond that particular grandpa that has that last name.  All we know is, it's made doing family history a bit difficult...  (Thanks, Grandpa!)

As part of this weekend's family reunion, Mom composed a poem explaining how and why the name McLaws came to be. (Note: there is nothing legitimate to back this up.  It's all just for fun!)


THE CHANGING OF THE NAMES
or, how the McLaws name came to be

By Sharon Matsen McLaws
7/27/2013

Away yonder land, past the mountains and moors,
Lied the green pastured hills of the Mighty MacDorrs.
MacDorr was the chief of the ancient of clans
He was big, with a beard, and strong muscled hands.

Well, MacDorr had a foe, it was sneaky MacLeary--
His kin? They were cheaters!  They made others weary
Of watching and guarding their cattle each minute,
Lest MacLeary let the cows go, and then they cannae fin' it.

One day after cattle were stolen stolen by Leary,
MacDorr stormed to him, but without gettin' teary,
Said, "MacLeary, you theif!  Give back me my cattle!
You'll hang for this, Jim, till we hear your brains rattle!"

MacLeary said, "Oh, just a minute there, lad,
I've got information you wish you never had--
See, I've been doing some searching on my family tree,
And it turns out we're cousins, so you let me be!"

MacDorr, he was furious!  Madder than hell!
He couldn't imagine what MacLeary would tell.
Leary said, "I've a granny with last name MacDorr!"
Than MacDorr said, "Then I, from this time evermore,

Denounce that last name--no longer we'll be
MacDorr; from now on we are Clan MacElfee!"
Years went on, well, it was hundreds, or more,
And the MacElfee Clan took their cue from MacDorr--

They changed their name this way, and that way, and then
They changed it all sideways, and then back again.
Over the ages it slid and it slod
After every small skirmish or scuffle or nod.

No one could tell who was kin or who wasn't.
For no one could keep track of aunt, uncle or cousint.
MacDorr, sure'n he'd be 'shamed if he knew
What a mess he stirred up--like a relative stew.

Now, today we're not sure when it happened, or why,
But we're reapin' the actions of days gone long by--
From MacDorr to MacElfee, then MacDuff and MacCain
MacGreggor, MacLaughlin, MacTaggish, MacLain,

MacDonald, McEwen, McElrond, McLon,
Till came from those lines a surgeon named John.
He thought, I should stop all this nonsense, and pause,
To make it official, we shall be Clan McLaws.